Thursday, April 23, 2009

Answers, sort of

My OB finally called me yesterday, after only 3 weeks of waiting. First, I find out that someone in his office screwed up and didn't send my Mycoplasma culture for Mycoplasma, they sent it for Herpes. I am still so pissed about that. I have an appointment with the MFM for a consult on May 6, I NEED those results. Ugh. And I had to wait 3 weeks to find out the ran the wrong damn test?! Not to mention, I'm a married woman, been that way for almost 11 years and now I have a record of being tested for Herpes. Thanks so much for that embarrassment. So now, after much wrangling and pissiness on my part, I go back in for another culture on Monday evening.

The bloodwork also came back. I'm not really sure what most of this means at this point (still googling LOL), but I'm heterozygous for MTHFR with Protein C Deficiency. I know that it means I have one copy of the gene for MTHFR, which is better than having two of them and I know that MTHFR is a blood clotting disorder. There was also some other issue that he said "I'm not sure what that is about" but I don't know what that was. I will ask him on Monday when I go back for the culture. MTHFR can cause pre-eclampsia/HELLP Syndrome, which may be why I had pre-e twice and HELLP once. If I get pregnant again, I will need to take a daily shot of Lovenox. I am going to be a freaking pharmacy if I get pregnant again.

So now I'm still waiting, waiting, waiting. I feel like that's all I've freaking done for the last 10 weeks and 2 days since Sydney died. It is nice to know about the MTHFR, but that doesn't give me answers about Sydney. I want an answer. I want a name for this damn infection that took my baby's life. It probably won't make me feel any better, but at least I'll know. This whole testing, waiting, etc, thing has been one big clusterfuck and I am just so freaking pissed. Why can't SOMETHING in my life just go right for once? The last 10 weeks have been one shitty thing after another and I have just had enough. I feel like I'm going to just snap.

1 comment:

Foreverloves said...

I truly do hope that you get an answer. I truly do. But I will say that I did NOT get an answer. Not a real one, anyway. My placentas were tested and it was discovered that I contracted an infection "of some kind". How? What kind? No one could ever tell me. The research I did on chorionamniotis and funistis (I'm sure I'm not spelling that right anymore) indicated (something like) "it is never present in a second twin and not a first." One of the placentas did not test for these infections - only mild ones that can be found in almost any placenta particularly a preterm one. So at least I can be assured that it was my oldest son Jacob that was ill. Somehow. I can't say why and I never knew.

That was one of the hardest things for me to accept - the not really knowing. I knew I'd gotten an infection but I could never know from what. Without knowing that, every doctor that I saw told me that there was no treatment for it. Taking massive antibiotics throughout a subsequent pregnancy would not help. They could not screen for an infection when they could not truly identify the pathogen. Etc and so forth. I was left with "this usually doesn't happen again."

So far, it hasn't.