It has been awhile

I haven't posted in quite awhile. I'm not sure why, other than I feel like I'm saying the same things over and over. We're still TTC and that has been disappointing. Last month, my period was 2 days later than normal. My cycles have been 28 days exactly since March. I guess I ovulated a couple of days late last cycle. I've been swamped with work and school, as usual.

We went to the cemetery and took a small Christmas tree and some other things out there. They have finally set the headstone into the ground. Eric went by there one day after work and saw that it had been done, but it still hit me hard. It is so permanent. This was the first time I'd been to the cemetery in quite a while. Again, I don't know why. I think I said it awhile ago, but I think I'm avoiding, which isn't good.

Eric and I picked a baby from the Salvation Army's angel tree online. She's 6 months old. I wanted to buy for a baby girl the same age as Sydney should've been. It was so hard to shop for this baby girl when I want to shop for my baby girl so much. I hoped it would make me feel better, but I don't know. I just miss Sydney so much. Last Christmas, I was so excited to think about having a new baby for this Christmas and celebrating her first Christmas this year. She should be here.